Long After Dark’s Five Different Christmas Songs
Odds are you’ve been hearing a lot of Christmas songs on the radio, in a shop, or in passing the last two months. To give a change of scenery to the waning days of the holiday season, here are five tunes that don’t fit into the classic profile of a Christmas song:
5) “Santa Stole My Lady,” Fitz and the Tantrums – This Christmas tune is vintage Tantrums, as it brings out the powerful sound from the band to back Michael Fitzpatrick’s tale of Santa swooping “away his honey up the chimney sweep.” Released last year as a Record Store Day 7”, it is now available as a digital download as well.
4) “Mistress for Christmas,” AC/DC – It’s the sleaziest, dirtiest Christmas song ever written. Only AC/DC could make a head-banging Christmas song about “companionship” work.
3) “It Must Be Santa,” Bob Dylan – Dylan’s growling vocals don’t fit the typical Christmas song, but he does pen a delightful, though not particularly memorable Christmas song. Confession: It’s not so much the song, as it is the wacky video that brings this to the list. The bizarre short film has Dylan hosting what appears to be a Yiddish Christmas Party that is interrupted by a random chase scene.
2) “Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer,”
Dr. Elmo – The only song on the list that gets frequent airplay, it can get annoying after time number 78, but it is great the first time it comes on every year. Recorded in 1979, the tale of Grandma’s fateful encounter with a reindeer is Dr. Elmo’s lone claim to recurring royalties. The tune did pose tricky moral questions such as opening Grandma’s gifts or sending them back, or if one who plays with elves and drives a sleigh should get a license.
1) “Funky, Funky Xmas,” New Kids on the Block – Helloooo, 1989. The single from the New Kids on the Block’s Merry, Merry Christmas album doesn’t fit in musically or lyrically with what one would normally classify a Christmas song. Easily the only Christmas song to ever end with “kicking the ballistics of our Christmas wishes.” Check out NKOTB with Arsenio Hall: